Seasons and contentment

I have been in prayer a lot these past few days.  Praying that God will use me, to show me where He wants me, to reach those that He wants me to reach.  You see, sometimes, as a stay at home mom, I feel like my task at home is preventing me from reaching people out in the world.  I lose sight of the fact that my home is my first ministry.   I am a mom to a little girl and a baby boy, and a foster mom to many kids who come and go.  My prayer is always that God uses me in their lives...that seeds are planted here and then watered later on down the road.  But a lot of times I have a longing in my heart to do more...

Today God showed me something...He showed me that I need to trust where He has me...

The kids and I were on our way home from walmart this afternoon, the last stop to a very long and busy day.  In a shaded area of the parking lot sat a family of three.  A mother, a father and a little boy who looked to be about four or five.  The man held a sign that read "hungry and homeless".   Emily asked what they were doing so I told her what their sign said.  Then God laid it on my heart to be compassionate towards them and to provide for them.  I remembered James 2:15 which reads "If a brother or sister is naked and destitute of daily food and one of you says to them 'Depart in peace be warmed and filled' but do not give them anything, what does that profit?...Faith without works is dead".  I felt it heavy on my heart that I needed to show Emily what faith in action looked liked.  

We live not a mile from walmart so I looked back at her in the back seat and said "how about we go home and make them some peanut butter sandwiches?"  she got excited and replied "ya mom that's a great idea!"  I told her I thought that would make Jesus happy.  So we hurried home and packed a little sack lunch with sandwiches and chips, candy for the little boy and a brand new pack of crayons along with a new notebook that we had laying around.  Oh and a little flyer from our church with the service times on it.  We drove back to the same spot where they were and lo and behold they were not there anymore.  We looked around the parking lot for them but could not find them anywhere.  I explained to Emily why  now we needed to pray for them. And we did pray for them, around the dinner table.

If God laid it on my heart to provide for that family, knowing that they would not be there when we went back, then why did want me to do that?  He wanted me to do that to show my daughter what Jesus' love in action looked like.  He wanted me to show her what it looks like to live when you love Jesus.  And He did it to remind me that my ministry, my main ministry anyway, is at home, teaching my children.

I love how God has a way of showing himself to me.  And today I am content in knowing that I don't have to be out there saving the world to put a smile on his face.  I am in this season of life.  This season is sweet.   My kids are young and I know that in the blink of an eye they will be grown.  And in this season I am planting seeds, seeds that when watered and tended will produce a plentiful harvest.  I have nothing but gratitude for my God who loves me and guides me to his sweet contentment, and pure JOY <3 p="p">

a little lesson in gardening...

Sunday was a lovely afternoon to tackle the out of control rose bush in my side yard.  It was huge! A huge mangled mess of branches and thorns.  Nothing beautiful about it.  Nothing like my Nana's rosebushes that I remember from my childhood.  Now SHE knew how to keep her rosebushes beautiful! She planted them in the spot where they would get the perfect amount of sun, watered them with care, and pruned them every year so that the blooms would come back every year even more lovely than the last.
As I pruned back the twisted branches I thought of the scripture I had been reading the night before... John 15:2.."...Every branch that bear fruit He prunes, that it may bear more fruit."  When i clipped a branch, it didn't just fall to the ground.  It had to be tugged and pulled to break free from the mess of dead branches. The thorns dug into my hands causing scratches, and some had to be cut in several places in order to be separated.  It was  a lot of work, and after I had finished, it was not a beautiful rosebush....not yet...it looked like a stick bush.  Nothing more than a bunch of green thorny sticks growing out of the ground.
     How often I pray to be a fruit bearing christian!! But not often enough do I remember the pruning process.  So often I try to figure out God's plan before it's time, and when I can't figure it out I decide that I am just not able to be used by Him.  I have too much "Junk".  I am not gentle spirited enough, not wise enough, not respectful enough of a wife, or patient enough of a mom.  "I am just useless" I will think to myself.  Why is it that I feel the need to see all of God's plan to feel that He is using me?
    So I remember the rose bush.  It was ghastly looking in the beginning, but with Loving care, I, the gardener cut away those gnarly branches, and shaped it into the stick bush so that in due time it will produce it's fruit.  This time next year it will have many beautiful roses and the year after that it will have even more...and so on it goes...
    I may look like a stick bush (so to speak) at this point in my life, but budding season is coming.  I may look like a beautiful rosebush at this point in my life, but pruning season is coming.  Either way, the christian life is not  a life of just beautiful rosebushes (because those are only plastic).  Sometimes it hurts, sometimes it is uncomfortable, sometimes it is ugly.....but when I allow God to work on me, when I allow him to prune where needed, when I trust Him as master gardener in my life, I can expect the outcome to be nothing less than beautiful.