do not be discouraged, mama

I remember coming home from the hospital with my son when he was born.  He was my heart's delight.  For him I prayed so many times, and my deepest longing for another child had finally come to reality.  Those first few days were rough though. I remember being up with him almost all night the first night he came home. He cried and cried and I thought to myself, "What if this lasts 6 months...or even worse..? What am i going to do?" it was like a sudden dread. All he wanted was to be held and oh how I wanted to sleep.   But then in the wee hours, after i had rocked and sung, bounced and shhhhed; in the still of the night The voice of the Lord came upon my heart and said "this is your time to be with me. Draw near to me, my child, while you rock your baby.  Rest in ME, lean on ME, come to ME.

 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”  Matthew 11:28-30

My children are still young and I have a lot to learn about life and motherhood, but in these past few years, if nothing else, I have learned that He is there.  He is with me.  He is with me when I am pleading for forgiveness for not spending time with him today and now I am just. too. tired.

When I have lost my temper, He is there, not giving up on me.  When I am praying as I fold the laundry and feeling guilty because I am being a multitasking prayer, He is there reminding me that He loves my company.  When devotions with my kids are not feeling enjoyable because they are arguing over who gets to pray first, and I am like "seriously?" He is there, reminding me of the victory that they actually want to do the praying.  And when I am sitting still in His presence with my coffee in the morning,( just how I would love to be every morning, but let's face it moms, that's pretty much impossible) I am so thankful.  I am reminded that HE IS THERE.  And I have so much to be thankful for. 

And I have come to realize that when my heart is focused on HIM, I can not help but smile and be thankful, because He is with me. And oh how He loves me.

Tonight as I was putting my toddler to bed, I layed there on the floor next to his bed thinking of all the other things i could be doing with this forty five minutes, (because that's where we are in the bedtime battles) and  that still small voice of the Lord said..."Come to Me, draw near to me, talk with me..." And once again, my heart calmed and filled with so much gratitude.  not for all I have, but for who He is.  I forgot about the work that needed to be done and just talked with my Jesus...

 "Come near to God and he will come near to you." James 4:8

He knows our hearts.  He knows we are busy and tired and overwhelmed.  But He is right there with us. So come to Him, no matter where you are, and let your heart fill with His joy and peace.  We can find it in this crazy thing called motherhood....